Plexiglas Toilet

Plexiglas Toilet
Written by Chuck Panozzo and John Curulewski
Lead vocals by John Curulewski with Chuck and John Panozzo

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Don't sit on the Plexiglas toilet
Said the momma to her son
Wipe the butt clean with the paper
Make it nice for everyone
But don't sit down on the Plexiglas toilet yeah

A boy of 5 stands close to the toilet
Holds the lid up with one hand
Won't let go the lid for fear that
On his banana it will land
Don't sit down on the Plexiglas toilet yeah

Boy goes up he eats the enchilada
With the sauce that burns the heart
Family comes to visit family
Momma says don't belch and fart

Don't sit on the Plexiglas toilet
Said the momma to her son
Wipe the butt clean with the paper
Make it nice for everyone
But don't sit down on the Plexiglas toilet yeah

Everybody Sing!

Don't sit on the Plexiglas toilet
Said the momma to her son
Wipe the butt clean with the paper
Make it nice for everyone
But don't sit down on the Plexiglas toilet yeah

Don't sit on the Plexiglas toilet
Said the momma to her son
Wipe the butt clean with the paper
Make it nice for everyone
But don't sit down on the Plexiglas toilet yeah

Interpretation

Plexiglas toilets are an actual thing (who knew?).  This uncredited gem at the end of a Serpent is Rising side A made a few appearances on the Doctor Dimento novelty song show, as it was completely silly, probably recorded drunk and/or stoned. 

The mother wants to keep her new toilet clean so tells her 5 year old son not to sit on the toilet when defecating. She also advises him to use toilet paper so he doesn't smell when he comes out of the bathroom.

As it turns out, he only needs to pee, but the young boy is afraid to even let go of the lid because he is afraid that "on his banana it will land."

Later, relatives come to visit after the mother has served enchiladas, so she warns him not to "belch and fart."

It's nice to see the boys were having fun.

There was a nice opinion piece in the Montreal Gazette on June 26, 2020, about the comeback of plexiglas, tying in to the Styx song.

The Right Chemistry: Plexiglass is in tune with the times

Here's Tommy, Chuck, and Lawrence singing the song:

According to As Bad as This & Plexiglass Toilet / Так плохо как сейчас & Плексигласовый стульчак:

"This is the story I have been told about this song which came from Chuck Panozzo. It was written by John P AND John C. The only members from Styx on the song are the 2 Johns and Chuck. Dennis and JY wanted nothing to do with the song. They don't appear on it anywhere. Chuck said it was a big f*** you to Dennis who, at the time was writing artsy-fartsy, Emerson, Lake & Palmer crap."